How much time do we spend thinking about forgiveness and then putting it into practice? The ability to achieve forgiveness and let go of every past hurt is one of the most difficult hypercritical challenges we face when trying to attain peace of mind and happiness.
Forgiveness is not as easy as you think it is, but it's necessary for you as humans in terms of mental health, wellness, and emotional health at large.
Forgiveness can be a complex and challenging process, particularly when you have experienced hurt. The experience of being hurt can make forgiveness seem unfair and difficult. However, it is important to recognize that forgiveness is a skill that can be cultivated over time. By acknowledging the challenges and actively working towards forgiveness, it is possible to develop the habit of forgiving, leading to personal growth and emotional healing.
Whenever I have the chance to speak with people, I always emphasize that it's natural to feel hurt or develop a grudge after being let down or hurt by someone you trust. However, it's important to remember that it's unnatural not to forgive and let go.
When you don't forgive and let go, you begin to hurt yourself more, you become furious towards innocent people that are around you, you start degreasing in all aspects, your heart becomes heavy and that puts you in pain.
When you learn to forgive after being hurt by someone, you can experience relief from the pain. Holding onto pain for too long can lead to the development of bitterness, resentment, and anger. This can trap you in a cycle that makes it hard to forgive and prevents you from enjoying the beauty of life around you.
Forgiveness is a choice. It's the process of uncovering and letting go of the anger in you while restoring hope and moving on with your life. If you don’t practice Forgiveness you might end up getting hurt all the time with no peace, that's why is important to forgive.
When you come to the realization of what forgiveness is, and embrace it, you will come to find out that you embrace peace, joy, sound health, and a balanced mind rest.
What Is Forgiveness.
Forgiveness is a decision you take by yourself to let go of resentment and thoughts of revenge, when we talk about forgiveness we're talking about letting go of that grudge inside of you and bringing peace that will help you go on with your life.
Note: Forgiveness does not mean you are erasing your past from your head or forgetting what might have happened to you in the past, forgiveness does not mean people will change from their bad way or bad character.
What it means to forgive is letting go of that pain that's killing you up gradually, and moving on to a better place. Mind you forgiveness is not a one-day affair, it's a thing you practice and then improve on it.
Benefits Of Forgiving Someone.
Being hurt by someone you truly trust and love can lead to sadness and anger, but if you allow the negative feelings to crowd your positive feelings, then you might as well find yourself drowning in your shell of bitterness.
Having the benefits of forgiving someone and letting go of bitterness and grudges can pave the way for improving the following.
1. Mental health.
2. Less hostility.
3. Lower blood pressure.
4. Reduction of anxiety.
5. Sound sleep.
6. build up your self-esteem.
7. Build healthier relationships.
8. Reduce depression.
If you find yourself holding onto pain and you find it difficult to let go and forgive, my little hunch will help you develop the skill to let go and forgive.
1. Forgive And Let Go.
Have it at the back of your mind that, the act of forgiving someone is for your benefit, not for someone else. Mind you, you are not just going to forgive someone in a second or one day because you were told to forgive,
forgive is something that takes a lot of time to get over, so being patient with yourself is very necessary, I know that is very difficult at times to separate how or what you feel emotionally, but you just have to practice the act to let go.
I for one have been hurt so badly that I find it difficult to forgive, it hurt me so bad that whenever I remember the situation or hear the name of the person I become harden and furious,I couldn't forgive and I refuse to let it go,
I have experienced deep emotional pain that has made it incredibly challenging for me to forgive. The hurt I felt was so intense that every time I recall the situation or come across the person involved,
I feel myself growing hardened and overwhelmed with anger. I've found it impossible to let go of that pain, and forgiveness seems out of reach for me.It affected me so deeply that I didn't even realize I was neglecting myself, and it became apparent to everyone around me how disheveled I appeared.
"Even when I made an effort to appear good, my inner bitterness and anger overshadowed any beauty I tried to show." After feeling overwhelmed with anger about even the smallest things, I made the decision to forgive and let go. I was pleasantly surprised by how much lighter and relieved I felt.
It was as if my heart had been set free, bringing me a sense of peace and joy reminiscent of a carefree child.My beauty returned and shone so brightly that others could see. The pain of hearing the names of those who hurt me and feeling hurt inside vanished. That's when I realized I had forgiven and let go.
When you make a conscious effort to concentrate on redirecting all your energies towards recognizing the advantages of forgiveness and releasing grudges, you open yourself up to a smoother journey through life.
Letting go involves acknowledging the pain you've internalized, but refusing to let it overshadow your ability to live in the moment and approach the future with optimism, free from any lingering feelings of remorse.
2. Focus On The Present Not The Past.
When you focus on the past too much, it can be difficult to move forward. It's important to learn from the past, but dwelling on it excessively may hinder your progress and prevent you from embracing new opportunities. Keep your eyes on the future, and focus on the potential ahead.
It's important to prioritize focusing on the present and accepting that the past is behind us, rather than allowing it to influence our current moments.
For me, this was the method I use to forgive and let go when the past was hurting me because I refuse to let it go.
I had to channel the energy I placed in the past to the present, I forgave the people in my past and concentrated on the present, what I could do better for myself and what I intend to change for myself all these were my priorities,
I was engross with these thoughts that I couldn't remember how I was hurt in the past. And peradventure I remember, I was always grateful for my present knowing fully well my future would be as amazing as I thought.
When you reflect on your past always realize that the past is over, and it's not coming back anymore, else in your mind, it will cause stress and unhappiness. Instead of placing all your focus on the past, try bringing back your focus to the present moment and at the same time find what gives you joy and peace of mind, and acknowledge all which gives you joy in your present moment.
3. Never Go To Bed Angry.
Avoid going to bed in an angry state of mind, it's totally bad, and the worst part of it is you won't enjoy your sleep. Why? Because your heart is full of anger and hate this attribute won't bring sleep to your eyelid mind you, your subconsciousness controls everything happening around you.
One of the best ways to fall asleep or sleep peacefully when angry is to let go of that anger, and to do that is listening to blues which I recommend to countless numbers of people,
listening to affirmations, while listening to each of them, start visualizing that which you want at that very moment, you won't know when you doze off.
4: Feel And Express Your Emotions.
Ignoring your pain will definitely prevent forgiveness, mind you, you can never heal what you can't feel, you only heal what you can feel, and there is never forgiveness in a room full of anger, hurt, and sadness.
This was one of the ways I was able to forgive and let go, yes, I had to feel the sad emotion, feel the pain, feel the hurt, it got to me so badly that I could not hold back my tears, I allow myself to feel what has happened to me in the past and it was hurtful, emotional, and nice,
because I allow myself to pass through that pain instead of ignoring it and acting up. I poured out all the negative emotions, relieving myself of the negative energy, only with that was I able to forgive and let go.
But until we come to realize that we all just need to release the emotions that have held us bound for a very long time, we won't be able to forgive, and forget about the past, and that can be a blockage to the future.
So it's better to forgive and let go than to keep the offence in your mind. Keep in mind that there's no self-forgiveness without passing through the road of hurt.
Finally do not get stuck in your own emotions, protect yourself and hold strong boundaries toward people, honour your space and you are good to go.
5. Look How You Might Have Contributed To The Situation.
"I often turn to this remedy to help myself forgive and let go. There was a time when everyone around me started complaining about my behavior, which I knew was different because of the pain I had experienced in the past. This pain was truly affecting me, and I needed a way to address it."
Upon deep reflection, I acknowledged the need to be brutally honest with myself. I reevaluated the events that transpired in the past, resisting the urge to be sentimental. It became clear to me that I had a small role in what unfolded, although I did not anticipate the eventual outcome. Nevertheless, I gained a profound understanding of why things played out as they did.
Letting go at that instant was the best thing I could do. I forgive who hurt me, forgive myself, and let go of the hurt. That was how I restored my sanity and emotional health. Without being sentimental, learning to find out how you have contributed to the situation in the past can help you forgive and let go.
If you happen to know how you have contributed to the situation then you change the situation by reflecting your mind on what happened, what was the offence all about, was it deliberate, or insensitive.
When examining a situation where you feel hurt, consider the possibility that the person who caused the hurt might be unaware of the impact of their actions. Evaluating the circumstances with empathy and understanding can help you find the resolve to forgive and release the hurt. This allows you to move forward positively instead of carrying the burden of anger and pain.
However, when trying to look at how you might have contributed, place yourself in the person's shoes to know the reason why he/she acted that way, though, in a situation like this, it's either one of you or both parties had a very bad day at work,
family or friends, that both end up have grudges toward one another. So it's best in cases like this you find time and realize whose fault it is and then forgive yourself.
Here are some tips that will help you in forgiving someone and letting go if you are hurt.
1. I just acknowledge that we humans are allowed to make mistakes.
2. I remind myself that I forgive humans not for them, but for me and that’s easier to give than to hang on to so much anger, hurt and betrayal
3. When you remember why you love them you know love is about forgiveness.
4. Remind yourself how much forgiveness could mean to you, if it was your turn for a mistake.
5. just learn to smile and let things go.
6. forgiveness comes easy when you know that what people say or do is about them, it's not about you.
7. Shift the focus, feel the pain and think of the thousands of others in the world who are also feeling the same pain. Then send a loving kind message to everyone to be relieved of this suffering.
8. I allow myself to feel again whatever I didn’t express " in the moment " when I was with them. Forgiveness always seems to follow those difficult emotions.
9. Remember that we are all doing the best we can at the same time.
10. I know that I need to forgive someone not for their benefit, but for my peace of mind.
11. For some wrong I just have to remember that they are responsible for their actions and then it is easier for me to just let it be.
CONCLUSION.
If you ever find it hard to forgive someone always remember that forgiveness is not a one-day affair nor is it an insatiable process, all you need is to understand that psychologically forgiving commits to your unique peace of mind and all your mental health.
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